Lasik lament

EYES left

I'm still playing catch up on my blog but figured I'd do a daily rant and fill in later. I say rant since before this entry, most of my posts are sort of critical reviews (sometimes glowing, sometimes bitchy) of the plays, lectures, films, restaurants, and other things I do or attend. Today it's all about me complaining about me.

Last week I had Lasik eye surgery. Everyone I talked with and consulted said good to great things about it. I found one of the leading, top-listed surgeons in the city. He even teaches - listed on several rankings of NYC's best doctors. I did my research, knew the questions to ask. He is using the latest laser technology (VISX® Star S₄ Active Trak® Excimer Laser System) and the latest eye mapping and analysis equipment. He checks for tons of things that could cause dry eye, halo or star burst effects, or other complications. He said he rejects 30% of the people he sees because they are not good candidates. Only 2-3% of his patients need any adjustments. I was a good candidate given the testing they did, which was extensive. One machine using a red landing strip visual, one uses these very pretty purple rings on a black, dark background. They put me through a half-dozen tests and I felt thoroughly reviewed. I talked with two people who used him and recommended him - both saw 20/20 the day after surgery. I was hopeful.

ARGH! A week later and BLURRRRRR. While I can see better, I constantly have an urge to put my glasses on - which are now too strong. I can't see words clearly. Things are fuzzy and I get headaches from the eye strain. The doctor said it can take up to 6 months to see results. ARGH!!! How will I live like this until my next appointment in three months!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so screwed. I really hope I read back on this blog and think how silly I was; that everything worked out.

At today's visit, the doctor simply put in tiny-weenie tear duct plugs to help keep the drops in my eyes, not draining into my sinuses. I don't think eye lubrication was a problem as I've been putting drops in every hour and goo stuff four times a day plus this PM stuff at night. My top eyelids are puffy swollen with so much moisture. I don't have any dry eye concerns, double vision, or sticky lids. My eyes feel fine with the exception of these weird little bumps I now feel in my tear ducts. And who the hell ever invented tear duct plugs? Same crazy engineer who said, "Lets laser an eyeball and see what happens!" ARGH! I'd hate to have shucked out $5500, go three months in a blurred state with squinty eyes and then still need glasses.

So I write in big type. I've set my fonts on LARGE but every bit helps. Now where is that walker and pair of support hose so I can complete my quick progression into AARP-land.